The Gallery

ChrisGS1982

Its terrible, its really is. 10th October 2008

1 found this helpful

And shame on people who work at Norwich Union, (especially the one at Monks cross) who organise to end up at these places. It would make sense to save up money and spend a night in Leeds than go here. This place is awful it really is, honest! I don't go to nightclubs much anyway because I think they are overrated but this is just bad. But the team leaders of Norwich Union who organise to go here should be ashamed of themselves, they have no imagination at all. I don't understand people queuing in the cold, waiting for ages to get into a place like this. Im pretty sure Norwich Union have shares in this place. Well hopefull the credit crunch will kill this place off and give us something better!

johnboyd

one for the drinkers! 29th August 2008

1 found this helpful

You don't go to this place to get drunk, you go if you are ALREADY drunk. or dont go at all! haha. i've spent many a night here though and its what you would expect from a northern kinda of nightclub, its full of drunk people, drunk groups of blokes on stag dos and girls on hen nights and then just your generic drunk people. if they changed the door policy to only let sober people in the place would be empty. my strongest memory of this place is the first time i went, i met alot of people in the queue (it was at capacity!) and they were all drunk already. ive seen some scenes there though, the doormen trying to sort the drunks out etc. i dont know if its this place or if all clubs are the same these days, but i wouldnt go in there without my good mates.

Elaine2

Don't get fined £80 23rd February 2008

1 found this helpful

My son ended up in the Gallery on his 18th birthday and had to face having a criminal record or pay an £80 criminal damage fine. That would be OK if he had done anything wrong, but his only mistake was being nearby when someone punched a hole in the ceiling of the basement. Because he's tall and had scratches on his hands (farmer's son)he got the blame - could also have been something to do with his long hair.

Needless to say it really spoilt his coming of age celebrations - he was ejected by 3 burly bouncers and told to pay up or the police would be called. He said "call the police because I've done nothing wrong". The policewoman was sympathetic but said he had a simple choice - agree to pay up or go to court & have a criminal record. He agreed to pay. Be warned.

mazphd at 12/03/08

What an awful experience!

Gallery; not a venue known for its tact, intelligence or general 'niceness'.

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mazphd

The 'Scallery' 14th September 2007

4 found this helpful

Right-ho this place is not nick-named the 'scallery' for no reason. Truly it does live up to its full potential as a complete den of under-aged, beer fuelled multitude of yobishness.

If your really lucky you'll fall upon this place at the w/e when its full of hen parties and stag do's ready and more than willing to down the VK shots, run round the balcony, get lost on the numerous stairs (think an Escher portrait and not in a good way) and then puke up on your shoes as you frantically run toward the exit and attempt to hail a taxi from the no doubt tediously long queue.

If your a Fresher and new to york. You will LOVE this place. Its one of york's only few 'dance' venues - with some almost quite good student nights at the start of term... there's nothing they can't do with an inflatable sheep. Go enough times though (which you will) and soon the play list will seem overally familiar and come with a repeatative edge that befits watching neighbours twice in one day, that or the usual hollyoaks episode.

Still if your out to get compeletely trolleyed, and don't mind where your dancing feet end up (probably in a puddle of something sticky and slightly unidentifiable) then the Scallery is a lot of fun!

in short only to be frequented when there is a group of you - you'll survive if you stay with the pack, and probably have a really good time too!

If your one for sophisticated drinking, being able to hear yourself think, and take offence to red swirly carpets then this probably is not the place for you.

NikoTheFinn

Them were the days... 26th October 2006

4 found this helpful

aah, to be 20 and drunk again. for twas that that kept us going back and back and back to the gallery. always drunk before we got there, always approximately equally drunk when we left, on account of the horse's urine that they liked to call "beer". a sacrilege, if you ask me.

but what more can i say? happiness was so simple then, watching niggle roll rollie after rollie and sulk in the r&b/hip-hop "lounge" downstairs, looking down on all those young whipper-snappers making tits of themselves, but enjoying their pants off in the process. and then a rowdy rendition of robbie williams' "angels" to close the night off, all smiles and off-key chorus renditions and arms around shoulders, rubbing our youthfully pink and healthily inebriated faces in the armpits of the invariably sweat-drenched ouce100.

indeed, those were the days. i'm getting all misty-eyed just writing this.

but i still can't get myself to give this place more than one star.

Buraco at 26/10/06

Amusing, but half-hearted I feel. We need more from the Finn...MORE!!!

NikoTheFinn at 26/10/06

well, it could have something to do with the fact that i was at work, it was getting late, and i was ready to call it a day. but instead i couldn't call it a day, was killing a bit of time, and so the results of the review were perhaps a little lacklustre. and for that i apologise. will try harder.

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Buraco

Halcyon Days (never to be repeated) 24th October 2006

4 found this helpful

Right. Gauntlet down. This is becoming a contest of lexicon, wit and literary exuberance. Consider my jaunty beret tossed into the ring...

This is a place that inspires such intense comment and debate because it holds a special place in our hearts. The Gallery represents much that was great and gash about the historic city of York - home to myself, Soks, Obi, Jake and many more Trusted Places folk for our university days. Halcyon days indeed, for we were at our phsyical and intellectual primes, rampaging through life's barriers without a care in the world. Conquering all before us and becoming men of the world. Sowing our seeds, discovering the riches of our bountiful world. We were there...we were it. Or so we thought.

You see looking back now, we were all actually very young, naive, silly even, but we really thought we knew it all. Our views of what constituted a good night out is simply just a microcosm of this outlook. In our minds then, playing a game of basketball, knocking back 6 or 7 pints of lager to wash down a massive plate of hot dogs and chips while playing 'Think While You Drink', followed by a cheeky raid on a college karaoke night to do a team rendition of 'Angels', winding up at The Gallery to drink more and get rowdy, while making hapless attempts to pull women, well that constituted a damn good night out. And why the hell not. We had loads of fun and didn't even get hangovers in those days.

Now, however, the dream is shattered. The bubble burst and the pointy fingers of reality are poking at our ribs. Having aged and wised since we graduated, we have all, I am sure, re-aligned our perspectives. We are no longer blinded by the intoxicating fog of youth and Carling. We see the truth. And the truth is, a pretty bog standard Northen nightclub. They play cheese, they play rubbish house, they play 'R&B' and/or hiphop downstairs. Of course they do. They're catering to the undiminishing rabble of skint students and weekend townie warriors, who want to get trolleyed and try to pull. They have no taste in music (or if they do, they opt to abandon it at the doorway) they have no desire for aesthetically pleasing furnishings (even the flame-shaped sofas) they even don't care if every drink tastes like used washing up water. The point is, they're legless when they arrive, beyond superlatives when they leave and remember nothing at all the next day. Perfect.

So yes, it is a bit grim, but it serves a purpose and we should never forget the happy, happy days spent there in our triumphant past.

sokratis at 24/10/06

wow, is this a review or an essay? I see ouce went down the Hieronymous Bosch route - you chose the Byron one opting for the pen instead of the brush. Very admirable, but speak for yourself foo when you mention primes - I'm yet to peak.

Buraco at 24/10/06

aah, you fall into my cunningly laid prosaic trap. you see we thought we were in our primes, but we were naive simpletons really. now we know the truth about priming in later life. how ya gettin on with that novel then eh?

sokratis at 24/10/06

yeah, that prosaic thing always gets me. Leave the novel out of this - too much of an insider.

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sokratis

Can it be that bad? 24th October 2006

5 found this helpful

Oh yes, it can and worst. My favorite bit about this place is that they don't let you in if you don't wear 'shoes'. Yes, that's right 'shoes'. It's not like you're trying to get in barefoot or wearing flip-flops, but if you're not wearing black or brown shinny leather shoes (or boots I imagine) you cannot get in. Did your fancy designer trainers cost you £500? Doesn't matter! You can't get in if you don't wear 'shoes'. You want to talk to the bouncer and explain? Don't bother, you can't get in if you don't wear shoes.

Like I said in my comment though, they do have some quality competitions. I remember leaning against the DJ booth, contemplating my reasons for being there, life in general, trying to think about the good things in York (and they were many), feeling more and more miserable…when the MC goes ‘The first person to give us Bob's first name wins a bottle of champagne'. You know the brain has a funny way of processing important information through a whole lot of noise, so despite my stupor I immediately sprung into action and shouted ‘BOB'. Seconds later I was the proud winner of a fine (;-) bottle of champagne – something which I thoroughly regretted the following morning.

One note on the fellow reviewers on this place. I can maintain all of my alooff smugness with a clear consience, having being in that place only after a few special occasions, like a birthday or big basketball win, after having consumed a lot of alcohol before going and only after vast amounts of peer pressure. Still I always clearly stated my view on the place, which hasn't changed since then. However, this is not what you would have heard by the likes of ouce100 and Jake 6 years ago. They thought the place was quality – in fact the only one worth going out till late in York. So take what they say with a slight pinch of salt.

Buraco at 24/10/06

i can't believe you brought the shoes thing up! that's standard across most of the country in rubbish townie clubs (and Yates's). but you're obviously too cool to know this, so I'll let you off.

sokratis at 24/10/06

It never stops to amaze me and the Gallery was the place where I heard it for the first time. Stil cracks me up every time I come across it. I heard it again recently in one of the big clubs in London - too embarassed to say which one.

Buraco at 24/10/06

but the guys who run these places, they really know their clientelle. anyone who disagrees with a 'shoes only' policy is gonna hate the place anyway, so the best thing for everyone is to turn them away at the door. credit where credit's due i say.

sokratis at 24/10/06

hmm, yes that is highly logical, or is it?

NikoTheFinn at 26/10/06

i still recall the incident at toffs when we had to smuggle dmitrius' shoes inside a trenchcoat for my brother so he could get in. can't believe that we actually put up with that kind of thing. hey ho, we were young.

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ouce100

Hell's not so bad 24th October 2006

4 found this helpful

If you didn't enjoy this place you just weren't drunk enough....I'm talking double figures in watered down pints. Once you're drunk enough the now 25 hits blearing out and the legless old slappers stumbling along to them becomes quite....artistic. Everything becomes more beautiful. When you're drunk enough even the dj constant babbling over the music has almost an (allbeit northern) eminem freestyling feel to it.
Two words of warning:
1. Stay close to your friends. The legless slappers usually hunt in packs and if you become isolated....you're finished. You could end up with one of the devils mignons...and then you'll be in a world of pain. Your friends love you and can be your only form of defence.
2. Don't go there sober. I did once. It caused quite a step change in my view of humanity. For that lesson in life the gallery gets my one star

walid at 24/10/06

My god, sounds like this place should be put in a zoo and observe the creatures doing their act from a distance and behind bars ;-)

ouce100 at 24/10/06

You don't know the half of it. I think all yorkies should review it. You ain't lived until you've been to the gallery

Buraco at 24/10/06

"a step change in my view of humanity"??? what did Tokyo Joes do to you then? You're too aloof in my opinion - I'm gonna set the record straight.

Buraco at 24/10/06

an another thing..what the frig is with the pictures?? just trying to rack up points with randomiser eh? although one does have Steve Harmison outside the club, which is very good.

sokratis at 24/10/06

i think he s being metaphoric - using imagery to evoke impressions of hell. Artists have been struggling with that for centuries, but only Ouce100 (hey can we take out the 100 from your username - what's all that about?)has managed to make the connection with a club in York - very clever indeed.

Buraco at 24/10/06

obi's still clingin to his york years with a username that's from his york email address. just let it go lil man. let it go now....

jake at 24/10/06

buraco you can't praise the gallery for the rose tinted memories that the place may have left with you and then ask obi to 'let it all go'.

You, my friend, are a hypocritical aesthetic strumpet of the very worst kind.

Buraco at 24/10/06

i'm not sure i've got a comeback for that insult. touché

ouce100 at 24/10/06

Thanks for laying down that smackdown jake. I couldn't have put it better meself

Buraco at 24/10/06

typical - hidin behind the ginger warrior to do yer dirty work.

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jake

The Gallery, York, Uk, Earth 23rd October 2006

6 found this helpful

Righto. To put things into perspective I should perhaps point out that I go clubbing for the music and not the cheap horrible after hours lager, horrible desperate 35 yr old slappers desperate for a bit of young ass, and aggressive townies. If you DO go clubbing for this sort of thing: well done. Give yourself a pat on the back and congratulate yourself on another successful one night stand. This is the place to be if you buy 2 CDs a year from Tesco (ultimate anthems 3!)and like Will Young and or The Pussycat Dolls. Knock yourself out with the sticky carpets, overpriced and watered down beer, obnoxious locals boozed up to the limit, and toilets spattered with vomit on a saturday night. If you're very lucky, there will probably be be a fight. Wahey!!

In short: I'd rather eat my own foot. Or, in fact, go to any other of the 'popular' York nightclubs.

sokratis at 23/10/06

Ah the memories come rushing back. Thanks for the reminder, you forgot to mention that occassionaly they give you out champagne (well that's what it says on the label anyway) to the lucky winner of some really hard competitions like 'The first person to give us Bob's first name, wins a bottle of champagne' - I kid you not, I was once such a lucky winner by virtue of the fact that I was standing next to the MC (that's another key point you forgot to mention)

Buraco at 23/10/06

booo! how can you diss the place that gave me so many happy memories? i question your integrity as a reviewer. the only bad thing i have to say about this place is that they once sent me away at the door for being too drunk. as if??

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